Oh man, I remember when the Steam Deck first hit the market. It was like everyone suddenly wanted a mini gaming PC to lug around. But then, bam! Asus ROG Ally bursts onto the scene, like some unexpected plot twist in an old school detective novel. Surprised? Yeah, me too. It’s a bit chaotic, in the best way.
So, where do you start with this? Well, if you’re not into the whole Linux thing – and seriously, who isn’t confused by Linux? – the Ally is your jam. It’s basically tricked out with Windows 11, so none of the cryptic magic needed to run your favorite game launcher. Steam, Epic, Xbox Game Pass…whatever the flavor of the month is, the Ally’s ready for it. No wizardry required.
Anyway — wait, oh right — competition. Steam Deck isn’t flying solo anymore. Because the Ally, man, it’s packing some hardcore heat under the hood with its AMD Ryzen Z1 Extreme processor. Okay, that sounds super techy, I know. Basically, it handles games like a pro and doesn’t complain about being too hot or too loud. Kind of like my old toaster, though definitely a heck of a lot cooler. I mean, uh, temperature-wise and style-wise I guess?
Then there’s the screen. It’s got that sharp Full HD thing going on and it’s light as a feather… well, maybe not a feather but you get it, right? You can game until your thumbs fall off without worrying your hands will too. But – and here’s where it gets a little meh – it doesn’t quite feel as sturdy. Like, it might break if I give it a stern look. And the stand… I mean, was there even a stand? Felt more like a flimsy piece of… well, less said the better.
Oh, and the battery! Yeah, don’t even get me started. You ever get that feeling where you’re just settling into a game and wham! Two hours later, you’re out. Steam Deck keeps chugging along a bit longer – like the good ol’ tortoise to Ally’s hare.
Couple of extra niggles, though. No carrying case. I mean, come on, if I’m dropping 700 bucks, at least give me something to hold it. And those back buttons? I dunno, were they designed for tiny alien fingers?
So what do you do? Pick the Ally for its library and power? Or the Deck for its premium feel and portability? Totally your call. But honestly, can’t lose with either. They’re both next-level brilliance in handheld gaming.
